Christian marriage that will work must consists of two forgivers- Cleric

By 'Gbenga Bankole

The Minister in Charge of Christ Apostolic Church, House of Judah, Ibadan Oyo state, Pastor Ologunaye-Jacobs has said that true Christian marriage that must work must consists of two forgiven forgivers.

Pastor Jacobs noted this in his message titled "Are You the Christlike Husband to your Wife, Who is Controlling you Home?"

The Cleric said in his exact word that:" Christian men Often hide their control behind headship. Yes, the Bible does speak to the place of headship in a husband as read in Ephesians 5:22-33, but in context, it's not about domination or manipulation. Jesus is given as the model for headship in verse 23 (when you juxtapose the part a and b of the verse), the one who came not to be served, but to give his life for you and me.

"Headship in this context has more to do with servanthood than with being "in charge." It's more about his (the man) responsibility before God to encourage the relationship positively than about him demanding his own way. The mutual submission that is stated in Ephesians 5:21 provides a safeguard against marital headship from being used as a club or whip. Remember, A true marriage that must work, consists of two forgiven forgivers.

"When a woman has experienced over-control, abuse, boolling or harshness in her years growing up as a wife, submission sometimes may not come easily. Even later, when headship is carried out in a loving balanced fashion, she may be afraid that it will turn into domination. There may still be some wounds inflicted that need to be treated and healed.

"So, in Christian relationships as seen in couples (Ephesians 5:21ff), Couples can have good relationship with one another only as they consider one another, but When they insist on their rights without considering others, they only destroy harmony and fellowship (21). Remember, A true marriage that must work, consists of two forgiven forgivers.

"If a family is to enjoy genuine contentment, it must have leadership, yes, and this responsibility rests with the husband. As the church submits to Christ, so the wife is to submit to her husband (22-24).

"Christ’s headship of the church, however, was shown not through the use of force, but through the sacrifice of himself for her, so that she might be pure and faultless (25-27). Likewise the husband’s headship of the wife is shown not by forcing his authority upon her, but by treating her as equal with himself (28-29), and also in the way he serves the wife. Little do you know about many husband out there, call themselves Christians that has never in one way or the other give gifts to their wife and some are the one paying the children school fees when the husband has money and he's not dead. (am not saying here that it's only the husband that has the whole strength to pay school fees of their children, but what belongs to one belongs to both).

"Conclusively, There is unity between husband and wife, as there is between Christ and his church. This unity is the basis of the relationship (30-33)."

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