"The Perilous Time in Marriage" by Lady Evangelist Esther Ogunbayeje

“But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come. For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemer, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away. For of these sorts are those who creep into households and make captives gullible (Naïve, trusting, innocent) women loaded down with sin, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth…. But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them” 2Timothy 3: 1-14.


Perilous time is a dangerous, terrifying, risky, and hazardous time. It is a time of chaos and perplexity. Something that is very clear with the beginning of this chapter is the certainty of the experiences described in it. These things will happen towards the end of days (towards the end time), they will be so real to the extent that having these experiences will make many people’s hearts to become cold towards God and others-in the church, in their marriages and other relationships. But God wants us to be aware of these end time activities so that we are not caught unaware. But then unfortunately, not many people are taking note of these events, rather they see them as civilisation or part of life. 

These end time events according to this bible passage are that people will become:

Lovers of themselves- selfish

Lovers of money-greedy

Boasters-braggers, egotists

Disobedient to parents- insubordinate, rebellious

Unthankful- Ungrateful

Unholy-ungodly, immoral

Unloving- uncaring, lacking compassion

Unforgiving-merciless, callous


Without self-control-indiscipline

Brutal- Violent, harsh

Despisers of good- mockers


 Headstrong- Obstinate/stubborn

Haughty- Arrogant, snooty.

Lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God- selfish

Having form of godliness but denying its power- pretentious.

Some points to note are:

When the Bible says men- it is not referring to men but men and women.

The Bible did not say that these things will happen only outside the church, but right in the household of God, so we should not point accusing fingers to the unbelievers.

These events will affect marriages and relationships as deceivers and pretenders will creep into households deceiving people 2 Timothy 3: 6.

These activities can impact three aspects of relationships- i.e. considering these in relation to marriage - when making decision on marriage partner, early part of marriage and the later part of marriage.

There can be problems in marriage at any point, these problems come in different shapes and sizes.

Examples of problems in some marriages

Delilah- pretended to love Samson while she only wanted to sell him to the Philistines. She crept into Samson’s life, presented herself as innocent and harmless just as some people do today-Genesis 16.

 Abigail and Nabal – Abigail was a beautiful woman of good understanding who got married to a mean and harsh man. Even though he was from the house of Caleb, he was not a man of good character. 1 Samuel 25:2-3,

 The widow with little oil- She was the wife of a prophet who died not only in poverty but in debt. The creditors would have taken her children away if not that she ran to Elisha for help. 2 Kings 4.

Some reasons why people fall victim of these perilous activities, especially women are:




Wrong motive for marriage


Circumstances- problems e.g., delay in childbearing, in-laws, financial difficulties

Wrong advice


Changes in value


Effects of the end time events on marriages


Captivity- spiritual, emotional, and financial bondage 

Living an empty shell marriage


Strange women

Lack of joy



Being led astray

Being turned away from Christ

Difficulties- planning, living peacefully together or serving God together

Problems with raising the children.


One thing to note is that these things are happening in the household of God, though one will think they should only happen in the world. But God is a God of purpose. He does not do things irrationally. Marriage is a unique institution that He established for us to enjoy and not to endure. It must be noted that marriage is not instituted for crisis. It is not a battle ground for war. It is not a boxing ring for boxing or wrestling. It is not a competitive market for competition. Marriage is for companionship and bliss where irons are to sharpen iron. But unfortunately, the purpose of marriage has been degraded today. “And He answered and said to them, have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female and said, for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6. Having the knowledge of the purpose of marriage will help us to cope with the challenges because there is no marriage without its challenges and crisis can come at any time. Also, having the knowledge of the purpose of God for marriage will help the adults to guide the youth rightly.

Some other factors that can help to overcome these end time problems in our marriages are:

Having genuine repentance- Total surrender to Jesus and living according to His word- 2 Corinthians 5:17

Understanding the meaning of marriage and God’s purpose for His children- understanding God will help us to enjoy what He has given to us- one of these is marriage- Ecclesiastes 9:9. 

Being watchful -1 Peter 5:8

Being truthful to yourself- not pointing fingers Matthew 7:5. 

Being prayerful -1 Thessalonians 5:17, Psalm 127:1

Asking and building with wisdom- Proverb 14:1

Being patient- Ephesians 4:2-3 

Being humble and respectful- Philippians 2:9, 1 Peter 3:1

Showing love and consideration- 1 Corinthians 13.

Seeking godly advice- before and after marriage- Proverb 11:14.

Allowing God’s word and the Holy Spirit to guide you in all your decision makings- Romans 8:14.

In conclusion: We may not be able to control the world and other people, but we can control how we respond to events around us by allowing the word of God to guide us. We may not be able to change others, but we can change how we do things so that we can be fulfilled and enjoy what God designed for us to enjoy. We may not be able to change nations, but we can influence our little corners- especially our homes. We may not be able to do much, but we can steadily and persistently do the little things in our abilities as enumerated above and sometimes these little things are what make the difference between those who succeed and those who do not.

Lady Evangelist Esther Ogunbayeje

Christ Apostolic Church

United Kingdom



+44-7478044454/ +44-7988672933

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