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| Pastor G.S. Dada |
By Boluwatife Oparinde
The Superintendent of Christ Apostolic Church, Oke-Ado District Coordinating Council (DCC), Pastor G. S. Dada has charged Ministers of God not to neglect their families in the name of being busy with ministry.
Pastor Dada gave this charge at the CAC Oke-Ife DCC, Ibadan 2022 Ministers' Seminar, where he lamented that the neglect of families by Pastors for their churches is now a disturbing trend in the ministry.
According to the cleric, "it would seem for some that busyness and pulling long hours is the mark of a successful pastor. However, when we learn of countless pastors who burn out from exhaustion or from those who lose their families due to neglect or infidelity, one must wonder whether this model is good after all."
He addressed that the Scripture places a high emphasis on the family unit; stating that the scriptures seem to indicate that the pastor’s first ministry must be to his family and placing the family as one’s first priority, after God alone, is a prerequisite for ministry.
Pastor Dada said that, "the chief responsibility of the pastor as a family man is to care for his wife. Sometimes pastors’ wives feel lonely and neglected. For them, it feels like their husband is more married to the church than to her. But God has called every pastor to shepherd, disciple, and care for his wife (Ephesians 5:25–33) in a way that points to Christ and the power of the gospel."
"As a pastor, you are a man in demand. It can often seem like everyone expects something of you. Pastors serve and counsel and teach and lead and shepherd and on and on. At the end of the day, after relentlessly giving of themselves, pastors may feel like they have nothing left to give to their wives," he said.
The clergyman continued that the health and success of the churches and families are linked; stating that "family life is significantly important to the well-being of the church. If families are not healthy and vibrant, the church will not be healthy and vibrant. It is crucial and even necessary for pastors and leaders to set an example in this regard."
Explaining that ministers need to understand their calling as high and demanding and the nature of their caller, the clergyman stated that, "Our family takes precedent over our church. If we neglect our families, we eventually undermine our entire pastoral and teaching ministry. Inexplicably, a pastor’s leadership in the home directly correlates to his leadership in the church."
"Our family takes priority over our pastoral ministry. We are to sanctify our wives and children first. With all of this in mind, the pastor’s relation to his wife and children is of utmost importance. The pastor must give proper attention to and be sensitive to the needs of his wife. The wife of a pastor is often under just as much pressure as the pastor," said Pastor Dada.
Also describing the roles of the Pastor as the father of his family, the cleric declared that, "more judgment and less grace are often shown to the parenting of the mother whose husband is the pastor. Due to these realities, the pastor must be focused and intentional on giving his wife and children the attention, love, and leadership they need and deserve."
"A pastor’s wife and children need attention from her husband and their father. This means that the pastor needs to be faithful in taking a day off from ministerial duties. An entire day needs to be given to his wife and family," he said.
Pastor Dada listed some of the reasons Pastoral Families have problems as, "Criticism and conflict; Family problems; Stress; Depression; Burnout; Sexual problems; Financial problems; Time management."